The "better land" !

- Your eyes tell me the story of scratches and shadows.
- They are watching me all over the places, what I should do, I’m so terrified!
- don’t worry, it’s just a bad dream, relax; nobody is going to harm you here, here is safe. Remember; you are in the safe land. Now, you have freedom and knowledge to use. You are in safe hands here.
Here; is the land of liberated words and thoughts; remember, what you’ve been told.
She left you here; they let you in; to stay “forever”, so you can be confined and out of harm's way.
Remember;” Better life.”

: Yes, I remember. I remember everything; I remember her;” weeping, when she left me here.” I remember her; whispering to me:


“- darling, now you are going to be safe.
Don’t worry, everything is going to be alright, I am not here with you, but you’ll be safe, and you will be having a better life, I have to go back.
But you should know that, I care about you so much; you’re my darling; my love; that’s why; I am going to leave you here.
Remember, this is the better land; the world you deserve; even if you don’t have me around.
You are grown up now; you should live in the premier class society, even if you suffer of separate.
Remember I will be always being thinking about you.
Try your best to be the most excellent.
Because of my love, I am to blame to give you better chance in your life.

- Mother, I need you, I am not even thirteen yet, and I need you. I need you, while I’m growing up, what is going to happen to me, without being with you here, what if I fall in love, what’s going to happen to me?

- Remember; don’t ever, ever fall in love with anything or anyone, you deserve a better life, in an enhanced life; you don’t need to be in love; love will be a tragedy for you; it’ll stop you from stepping up hills.
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Remember; Love, is forbidden in the better land.

- Mother, what if I regret it; what if I get homesick?

- Remember; in the better land, there are not such things; like hometown, or getting reflective; getting homesick, is for me; for the people; with no security; that is why; they are regretful. These labels don’t go with you; don’t ever think like that.
-
- Never!
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Darling remember; you should be always happy; anywhere” you can have a better life”.

Detach yourself, of everything worthless.

Be happy; everywhere you are, and try your best to be the matchless.

- Mother; what do you want me to be? What is the most excellent? Am I not the best now? I am the finest at school, I am a good daughter! I am cleaning my room; I am painting fine, dancing well, and studying very hard, what then? what do you want ? Why aren’t you pleased yet?

- No I am not satisfied; you deserve “that better life”; the life;” I never could have had, and always, have wished for it.”

- Mom; what if, I don’t want to have a better life?

- You are just a child; you don’t know any better now, I promise you, that; one day you’ll understand.


Now, years have passed by, and I still don’t understand; the things she told me; in that night!
I remember everything, and I still don’t identify my life; as any better at this instant.
The only thing I know is; since that day, I never sleep well; never feel harmless or protected.
I always cry in my solitude, for being the “secreted dejected.”
I’m always alarmed, so nobody can harm me simply.
I have bruises all over my body; with the tears alongside.
I am in isolation, and always horrified.
To me; Life is so bitter, and disturbing.

Besides; I am carrying a gifted birthright; which my mom awarded me; always being prepared and alert; not to fall in love; with anyone or anything.
I am the “companionless, homeless”; in my mind, and in my spirit.

Every moment in my life I question; what I did to her, in order to be taken in to this” better life; this better land! With this better, enhanced intelligence!”

I can forgive her; for anything wrong; she did to me, anything; she skilled me, but I will always regret; her,” being my guardian angel;” “my mother”, just because she whispered softly;” Don’t ever fall in love my love.”

Saloume Nakhsaz